Some thoughts on marriage from Gary Thomas…

Earlier today I was reviewing a book called “Sacred Marriage,” which, in my opinion, is one of the best books available on understanding the purpose of marriage.  Here are some comments from the author concerning marriage, which are in no particular order of importance.

  • Marriage is full of challenges, joys, struggles, and celebrations that are designed to (1) draw us closer to God (love Him more) and (2) help us grow in godly character.
  • Thomas contends (rightly, I might add) that the purpose of marriage is more about making you holy than making you happy – this truth never ceases to amaze me and subsequently, kick me in the teeth.
  • Marriage is a “perpetual exercise of mortification” (Thomas, pp. 13).  Isn’t it true that marriage opens up facets of our sinful nature that we didn’t know existed or didn’t know were that bad?
  • In order to spiritually benefit from marriage we need to be honest, which means (1) looking at our disappointments, (2) owning up to our ugly attitudes, and (3) confronting our selfishness (Thomas, pp. 13).
  • Christian married couples need to rid themselves of the LIE that the difficulties of marriage can be overcome if they simply pray harder or learn a few simple principles. 
  • Marriage calls you to an entirely new and selfless life.
  • Concerning the sanctifying nature of marriage, Thomas writes, “any situation that calls me to confront my selfishness has enormous spiritual value.”
  • If the purpose of marriage was simply to enjoy an infatuation and make me “happy,” then I’d have to get a “new” marriage every two or three years. (Thomas, pp. 23)
  • The theme of Thomas’ book is spiritual growth and the context in which this is played out is marriage. 
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One thought on “Some thoughts on marriage from Gary Thomas…

  1. Thanks for the summary. I just finished the book over the weekend and as you said it is an incredible read. For me it turned the idea of marriage on its head and I know putting these things into practice will strengthen my marriage, but will also as Thomas suggests will strengthen my relationship with God. Thx again.

    By the way, I have a friend who is just starting in Children’s ministry. Any ideas on good books for those just starting out in Children’s ministry?

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